Deface value of this is fuck all.

I was scrolling through Magic.org at the page where they list the top ten sellers. I usually use it as a guide of what's really poor in magic and it's usually a good measuring stick.

On that list I noticed a new trick from Chastain Criswell - remember him? He's the one who wears a suit that looks like a bean bag from the household store of no taste.

The trick is called "Deface" and those lieing fucks at magic.org claim;

"Deface had an explosive launch. Chastain's last trick, Tag, was also a big hit right off the bat. You'll actually perform Deface - it's practical. Steve Beam and Dan Harlan have raved about Deface by Chastain Criswell."

I say they're lieing fucks because claiming that you'll actually perform this piece of garbage is a claim I don't think anyone can really back up.

It doesn't surprise me that Steve Beam and Dan Harlan loved it, if you've read Beams tricks in the semi automatic books and watched Harlan perform on those 'Packs small plays shit" DVD's from L&L then you'll know that neither of them would know a good trick if it gave them a free blow job.

Now before you go any further, I think you should check out the demo video for yourselves...

http://www.putfile.com/media.php?n=Deface113

Here's what the ridiculous ad copy says...

From the creator of this years bigest hit, TAG!
This is destined to be one of card magic’s newest and most incredible illusions. This trick is one you will perform; and leave the spectator with their jaws on the floor.

OK, so right off the bat a string of bullshit. Was TAG really this years biggest hit? Is it really an 'incredible illusion' or is it a waxy gimmick being slid across a specially printed joker?

I am also puzzled by the language here. It will the leave the SPECTATOR (singular) with their jaws (plural) on the floor. It's a micro illusion, you couldn't perform it for more than one person at a time anyway, so I assume its one person with two jaws.

Effect: A joker is removed from the deck and shown; the magician then proceeds to do the impossible. With only the tip of the magician’s finger the face of the joker is moved to the side of the card, removed from the card, and replaced. However as an after thought the magician decides this is not enough, so to leave the spectator in awe the face is moved once again. Not only did you move and remove the face of a "BICYCLE” joker but you leave the card in a way no one can deny could only be done by “Magic!”

OK.. now let's look at what really happens. If you watched the same demo as me... you push a cut out bit of a jokers face thats stuck on with wax across a card that's printed with the face of the joker missing. You fumble around like a klutz and show you moved it and then fumble a lot to go back. Then you steal the piece away and lift up your other thumb thats covered the extra printed face of the joker that's in the wrong place. The spectator's figure it out in an instant because the effect is the same as the method.

You'll recieve...
• Ten specialty printed gimmicked cards!
• Two regular Jokers.
• Instructions packed with ideas, routines, original impromptu version, three different handlings of the effect, and the building blocks to what will be the next hottest effect in magic!

TEN specially printed gimmicked cards? I don't know why they are giving you ten - no one will want to perform this more than once.
TWO regular jokers - yeah baby, count them! TWO! What value.
Instructions packed with ideas - yeah like "don't do this shit in public".

Here's a little tip if you're a magician wanting to put out an effect. Get some decent magician friends first and show it to them. If they know anything about magic and your trick is this fucking dire, they'll tell you and save you the embarassment of putting it out.

Also, how far up his own ass is this guy? He's put out one trick before which by all accounts wasn't bad. Now he thinks he's Vernon making claims like 'the building blocks of what will be the next hottest effect in magic' and 'destined to be one of card magics newest and most incredible illusions'.

MW.